The wet season is upon us here in Florida, and while that means preparing for hurricanes, figuring out how to lower your power bill, and trying to stay cool, it’s also the best time of year to take the family out hunting for crawdads.
But before you grab the buckets and wrangle up the kids, you have to think about what, or who, you’re going to sacrifice to the mighty Craw-God. The answer depends on how many mudbugs you think you’ll catch! Because the sacrifice has to be made beforehand, it’s important to plan your hunt carefully to avoid the terrible and vengeful power of Kracamx, the Immortal Lord of Freshwater Crustaceans.
A good rule of thumb is a pound of sacrifice for every pound of crawdads you plan on catching. Mammals work the best, and pet stores often offer 3 for 2 deals on sacrificial guinea pigs this time of year, although sufficiently large amphibians will work in a pinch.
Remember that it’s better to over-sacrifice than it is to under-sacrifice. You may recall a story we ran last year about the Mendez family: Jason Mendez offered Kracamx his family’s pet parakeet, but his son John got carried away and they ended up with a dachshund’s worth of crawdads. The Craw-God, in his mercy, took Jason’s wife Gloria, while the rest of the family were only inflicted with painful boils.
It may seem silly, and you may have heard stories about people who got away without making a sacrifice at all, but the safety of your family and the prosperity of your descendants isn’t something worth gambling with.
If you have any good crawdad tips, share them in the comments. Have fun out there!
Photo courtesy of https://www.flickr.com/photos/cygnus921/